Divorce According to Jesus

 

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Most Christians ignore this teaching.

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Matthew 19: 8-11

8 Jesus answered, “It was because of your hardness of heart that Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but it was not this way from the beginning.

9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.

10 His disciples said to Him, “If this is the case between a man and his wife, it is better not to marry.”…

11 Jesus replied, “Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given

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Romans 7:2-3

2 For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law of marriage. 

3 So then, if she marries another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress.  But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress, even though she marries another man

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Christians and Divorce

https://www.gotquestions.org/Christian-divorce-rate.html

According to a study, the overall divorce rate is around 33 percent.

Reexamined data pertaining to the divorce rate among Christians found that the numbers were based on survey-takers who identified as “Christian” rather than some other religion.

Under that broad classification, respondents were as likely as anyone else to have been divorced.

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The “Christian” category included people who profess a belief system but do not live a committed lifestyle (according to researcher opinion).

However, for those who were active in their church, the divorce rate was 27 to 50 percent lower than for non-churchgoers.

Nominal Christians—those who simply call themselves “Christians” but do not actively engage with the faith (according to researcher opinion)—are actually 20 percent more likely than the general population to get divorced.

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http://www.bereanpublishers.com/may-christians-divorce-and-remarry/#_Toc512917488

Jesus’ statements regarding divorce and subsequent adultery show that God does not recognize divorce, except for marital unfaithfulness. 

God considers still married all others who divorce for other reasons. 

To make that perfectly clear, even though a person has secured a legal secular divorce, that does not mean God considers that person divorced from his spouse. 

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The only legal grounds (according to the teachings of Jesus) are that there be marital unfaithfulness.

The key to a proper understanding of God’s view of divorce from those scriptures is that God considers those he joined together to be one flesh. 

In God’s eyes, according to his word, only death or unfaithfulness will break apart those God has joined together. 

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What If Separation is Necessary?

We can imagine many circumstances where separation is to be preferred over beatings, violence, marital rape, and where children are endangered or molested.  Scripture tells us God’s options for that situation. 

To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord):  A wife must not separate from her husband.  But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband.  And a husband must not divorce his wife (1 Corinthians 7:10-11). 

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What If the Offending Spouse Is Not a Believer?

To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. 

And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. . . .

But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. 

A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 

How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband?  Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? (1 Corinthians 7:12-16).

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Paul appears to say that in this instance a believing spouse can be released from marriage with an unbelieving spouse without marital unfaithfulness. 

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What could be the reason for this difference? 

I think it is because Jesus said, “what God has joined together, let man not separate” (Matthew 19:6).  So they are no longer two, but one (Matthew 19:5-6). 

We can rightfully assume that Jesus is speaking about marriages that God has joined together.  Paul wrote: 

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? 

15 What harmony is there between Christ and Belial?  What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?
(2 Corinthians 6:14-15). 

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https://wholeintentions.com/top-ten-reasons-for-divorce//

According to several divorce statistics, here are the top 10 reasons people give for divorce (notice adultery, or an unbelieving spouse, is not one of them):

1. We grew apart
2. We don’t make each other happy anymore
3. We aren’t in love anymore
4. It’s better for the kids if we divorce
5. I grew up but he/she stayed the same
6. We’re different people than when we got married
7. It isn’t fun anymore
8. I found a new person who really understands me
9. He/she let him/herself go
10. I deserve to be happy

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So where does this leave divorced and remarried Christians who divorced due to “incompatibility” or similar issues, and are now in a happy relationship, with children?

Answer: They are still living in adultery.

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What should they do?

This is a hard saying, but they should repent, separate and remain single, and teach God’s Word to their children, instead of setting a sinful example.

The children should be gently treated, and see both parents equally.

The children are victims of this situation, which is why the parents should have never entered into this forbidden marriage to begin with.

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Yes, the children will be hurt, but at least they will learn God’s will. The parents have already hurt them.

Otherwise, the children learn that is it ok to live in adultery, and they may copy their parent’s behavior.

So the children’s salvation may depend on the decisions of their parents, and what they teach their children.

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