Forget Yourself !


Someone who is really holy, and close to God, does not talk about how holy they are.


2 signs of Holiness


The first sign of holiness is “an insatiable desire to improve oneself.”

Insatiable means “incapable of being satisfied.” Holy people—truly holy people—are never completely satisfied with their lives, spiritually or morally.

In spite of the fact that they are very Christ-like, they are still very conscious of their sins—their little, nagging imperfections.

So they’re never morally complacent; they never make the mistake of thinking they’ve arrived spiritually. They are always striving to grow in their relationship with the Lord.


The second sure sign of holiness is “an unquenchable concern for unholy people.”

Notice, again, the adjectives there: unquenchable and unholy.

Both are extremely important.

Unquenchable is very similar to insatiable in its meaning.

And notice what the object of our unquenchable concern is supposed to be: other people—but not just any old group of other people, specifically other people who are NOT holy!

It’s easy to be concerned about holy people, is it not?

It’s easy to be concerned about people we like: people who are good to us; people who treat us fairly; people who treat us with respect.

Even unholy people have a genuine concern for the nice people in their lives.

But truly holy people go beyond that, and actually manifest a deep concern for the salvation and well-being of those who hate them and hurt them and treat them unfairly and disrespectfully.

So, holiness is all about love and service to God and others in need.

There is no room for the fleshly ego, and selfish needs.

Scriptures related to holiness and death to self

Scriptures related to being in the flesh


Most consider being in the flesh the same as sins OF the flesh listed in the scriptures….like sexual immorality, anger, sorcery, drunkenness….etc.

But being in the flesh can be more subtle than that…..with behaviors we see every day but do not normally think of them as “sin.”

When people are “in the flesh,” we will see these other traits:

1.  Need to be important

2.  Need to be superior over others

3.  Critical of others, attacks openly or by subtlety, by insinuation

4.  People see all events in reference to themselves. They are the center of their own worlds.

5.  Lack of control

6.  Resistant to change

7.  Resistance to obedience

8.  Everything has to be their way

9.  If others disagree, then they are heretics

10.  Denial of own behavior, do not admit to anything

11.  Self justification

12.  Constant need for reassurance or affirmation

13.  Un-teachable

14.  Easily offended

15.  Self centered. Life is all about them.

16.  Agitated. Cannot rest in the peace of the Lord

17.  Wrongly uses the Word of God

18.  Hides own sin, focuses on the perceived sins of other

19.  Their needs come first

20.  Their rights are more important than rights of others

21.  Little concern for the feelings or suffering of others.


What does “being in the flesh,” or having too much “flesh,” look like?

Well, in the physical, it looks something like this:


In the spirit , there is not much difference.

It is not attractive, yet people will continue on in this spiritual state.

It is repulsive to those around the person.

The next time you are “in the flesh,” remember the picture above.

Your spirit looks like that to God, and to true believers.


Subduing the flesh is not just a Christian concept.

Subduing the Flesh

The Word teaches us to die to the flesh, and NOT keep it alive:

Galatians 2:20

I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

Colossians 3:3

For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.

We should die daily, and subdue our flesh, and forget how “great” and smart we think we are, and humble ourselves before God.

As long as we are focused on OUR thoughts, OUR feelings, OUR rights, OUR reactions, OUR needs , we are “in the flesh.”

All our energy should be on God’s thoughts, God’s feelings, God’s rights, God’s reactions and God’s needs.


Contribution by Denise

You ask: “What is the best way to hide sin from others?”

The simple answer is that the hypocrite is the man who hides his own sin, not the one who conceals the errors of others.

At His trial Jesus did not open His mouth. He accused no one.

He left such necessity up to the Word of God. For, It is by the Word of God that we all shall be judged.

What are the unseen reasons which cause men to feel compelled to ridicule, expose the sins of others, and denigrate?

Could it be that a sense of superiority dominates their thinking?

Surely, in their own minds,  they feel they have not committed sins nearly as heinous as those they are exposing.

Arbitrarily they categorize the laws of God.

And they determine the degrees and magnitudes of sin.

They believe the sins committed by others are of much greater magnitude than are those committed by themselves—if they admit to any sin at all.

Is it possible that men censure, ridicule, and show contempt for others to cover their own guilt?

There is no man who does not sin.

The hypocrite is the man who hides his own sin, not the one who conceals the errors of others.

Psalms 32: Happy is the person whose sins are forgiven, who wrongs are pardoned; (2) Happy is the person whom the Lord does not consider guilty, in that person there is nothing false. (3) When I kept things to myself, I felt weak deep inside me, I moaned all day long. (4) Day and night you punished me, My strength was gone as in the summer heat. (5) Then I confess my sins to you, I didn’t hide my guilt, I said, “I will confess my sins to the Lord.”


We have some choices to make.

First, we must choose to be the Bride, and not just someone with a Christian label.

Second, as the Bride, we must guard our spirit, so we don’t end up looking more like foolish virgins.

We have to choose between the flesh and the spirit.

It is a war in our members, as Paul said.

We choose between holiness and being “in the flesh.”

We cannot be both.


Final note

It is a difficult thing to do , to abandon the flesh nature.

This is why the Holy Spirit has been given to us.

He can give us the power and comfort we need as we strive toward the mark of holiness.

We may never achieve perfection, and we will be a work in progress.

The enemy is against us, as well as our own fallen nature.

But, both the Lord Jesus, who died for us, and his Holy Spirit are there for our victory.

We must abandon the flesh, and put our trust in God, to achieve holiness that is not just pleasing to God, but achieves a state in us, where we finally feel really free.

Holiness is ultimate freedom.

We must forget ourselves, our egos, who we are, and focus on God , and Him in others.

You have my prayers, love and support as you fight this spiritual war.

Do not give up.

The final reward is worth the battle.

46 Responses to “Forget Yourself !”

  1. The Word of God, Jesus is Holy. He has no sin nature. When we abide in Him and He abides in us, we have no need to concentrate on our forgiven sin nature. When our focus is on Him instead of ourselves, sin is dead and He is alive.

  2. God Marianne you have really let yourself go. Was it your birthday?

  3. Good post except for the fat lady. ohhhhhhhhhh that is pitiful to say the least. God help that child. Demon possession comes in many different ways does it not.

    • hi beacon

      yes, I wanted to make a strong impression of too much flesh, and that picture seemed perfect.

      the girl has a gluttonous spirit

      • It is one thing to be over weight, it is another to be obese, and yet another thing altogether to be possessed! Food, for some people, can be an addiction – and be possessed by – hence the flesh.

        When we let the Word of God be our sustenance instead – or as Marianne said a few posts back for us to know the God of the Word.

    • ha ha

      may none of us ever look like that.

      in spirit or in body

  4. The fat woman – well, a picture is worth a thousand words. She was born sweet and pretty but became fat and gross.

    We are looking at the evangelical church also known as foolish virgins, those who are not wise and of the flesh (spiritual).

    Within the text – Notice the fat, picking and eating right off the tree, drunkenness and tables full of vomit.

    Very gross, but a visual of what God sees of these men, rulers of these people in Jerusalem (Church).

    Isaiah 28.

    “Woe to the crown of pride, to the drunkards of Ephraim, whose glorious beauty is a fading flower, which are on the head of the fat valleys of them that are overcome with wine!

    Behold, the Lord hath a mighty and strong one, which as a tempest of hail and a destroying storm, as a flood of mighty waters overflowing, shall cast down to the earth with the hand.

    The crown of pride, the drunkards of Ephraim, shall be trodden under feet:
    And the glorious beauty, which is on the head of the fat valley, shall be a fading flower, and as the hasty fruit before the summer; which when he that looketh upon it seeth, while it is yet in his hand he eateth it up.

    In that day shall the Lord of hosts be for a crown of glory, and for a diadem of beauty, unto the residue of his people,

    And for a spirit of judgment to him that sitteth in judgment, and for strength to them that turn the battle to the gate.

    But they also have erred through wine, and through strong drink are out of the way; the priest and the prophet have erred through strong drink, they are swallowed up of wine, they are out of the way through strong drink; they err in vision, they stumble in judgment.

    For all tables are full of vomit and filthiness, so that there is no place clean.

    Whom shall he teach knowledge? and whom shall he make to understand doctrine? them that are weaned from the milk, and drawn from the breasts.

    For precept must be upon precept, precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little: For with stammering lips and another tongue will he speak to this people.

    To whom he said, This is the rest wherewith ye may cause the weary to rest; and this is the refreshing: yet they would not hear.

    But the word of the Lord was unto them precept upon precept, precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little; that they might go, and fall backward, and be broken, and snared, and taken.

    Wherefore hear the word of the Lord, ye scornful men, that rule this people which is in Jerusalem.

    Keep reading and see what is going to occur, similar to those foolish virgins outside the door, knocking to enter into His rest.

    Psalm 25

  5. Tom aka Beacon,

    “Brothers and sisters, all of you should try to follow my example and to copy [L watch closely; pay attention to] those who live [walk] the way we showed [modeled it for] you. Many people live [walk] like enemies of the cross of Christ. I have often told you about them, and it makes me cry to tell you about them now. In the end, they will be destroyed [Their end/destiny is destruction].

    They do whatever their bodies want, they are proud of their shameful acts [L their glory is in their shame], and they think only about earthly things.

    But our homeland [or citizenship] is in heaven, and we are waiting for our Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, to come from heaven. By his power to rule [L subject to himself] all things, he will change [transform; transfigure] our humble bodies and make them like his own glorious body” (Philippians 3:17-21, Expanded Translation).

    I think demons come with their oppressive ways (unconscious communication, impacting human behavior and actions) when there is an opportunity given them due to “foolishness” and not walking in the light.

    “But if we live [L walk] in the light, as God [L he] is in the light, we can share [have] fellowship with each other. Then the blood of Jesus, God’s Son, cleanses us from every sin” (1st John 1:7, Expanded).

    Psalm 25

    • DJ – I’ve always appreciated and believed a lot of things you have posted. Of course not all. But that is alright. Yes “fellowship” is needed by every Christian their is. I have watched many a debate on TV and Video by well known men that be scholars and yet disagree and have no problem after the debate. But it seems when Christians are writing them out in posts. It becomes a lot harder to digest even for myself. For we do not face our fellowman. To see his spirit that is in him. Or his kindness and sincerity. So we just got to do the best we can. And have faith that our message touch’s someone. Amen.

      I understand teaching a message that is not popular. A lot no doubt think I just want to be contrary or a fuss er. But I am not. I will speak for the Message of the hour. The New Wine is hard to drink after so much confusion in our church age today. This age has crossed on over the “baby food” and are seeking answers for today’s confusion. As Paul said – those not grown will choke on constantly.

      The meat makes the faith muscles grow and in able a believer to stand on their own. I really believe that we all have to stand alone with Christ.

  6. There is not one person on the face of this earth who walks constantly in the spirit of God. The body of Christ can judge another who is merely sharing an “instance” of being used as pride>full of self. Losing the flesh in this life is not entirely possible, yet holiness, it is not boasting OR judging the intent of another expressing an experience of the Spirit of God moving.

    • The fat picture is very sad. People who manifest this sin of gluttony are obvious and some from my understanding is their body failing them without their control to make them fat.
      Sin is sin, we should abhor it however it manifests; especially what is hidden in our own hearts’ toward others’.

      • I agree about the fat picture….It is actually very sad….I can imagine she has nothing else in her life.

        so it is with all those who live solely in the flesh will led a solitary life….

        true none of us are totally holy and can stay out of the flesh 100 % of the time, but this is just a reminder if we let things get out of control and go too far in the flesh direction.

        • We all interact with people being human, so no man is an island. She cannot not even care for herself, if she can even walk out of the house, she would immediately be scorned and laughed at; Jesus loves her…
          What about those who in hidden overeat but their bodies do not show it? Jesus was most concerned about the hidden sins of the heart.
          Living a solitary life can take on many aspects Marianne. Living in the flesh, well it does not having anything to do with living alone, sin has much company.

          • Only God is good? Luke 18:19
            l have a very hard time understanding this scripture, since Jesus being, “God in the flesh,” said this.

  7. Jesus said, We shall know them(HIS followers) by their fruits: love, joy, peace, patience,longsuffering,goodness, kindness,self control=(Son of God, holy meter).

    I guess I don’t get this article Marianne. The post of the morbidly obese woman and then a photo and quote of fasting, gaunt, “holy”? HIndu, Gandhi .

    I wonder what inspired you to write this? Bless you.

    • susan

      maybe this was not a good post.?

      point was…..holiness and being in the flesh are opposites

      and many who think they are holy are actually in the flesh……and not holy at all

      they judge others when the “beam is in their eye”…..

      I wanted people who were too much in the flesh to see the listed behaviors and examine themselves.

      this does not apply to those devoted to pursuing holiness in their daily lives, but battle with weaknesses they are aware of

      people like gandi are closer to dying in the flesh than many christians…it is a concept understood by other cultures but it is not something you see much in western society, which is self indulgent

      • Thank you, I guess you are generally speaking here, not just to believers who strive to be led by the Holy Spirit and truly grieve when we have sinned… ?
        I agree, our culture is very self indulgent; affects U.S. Christians…?..! bigtime

        I once saw a bumper sticker: I would follow Jesus, if it weren’t for Christians. Quite profound; we truly fall short.
        without HIM, we can do Nothing~

        • I know. christianity has given itself such a bad reputation with all the hypocrisy and sin in the church that the outside world mocks us, and makes me ashamed to be called christian…

          I am not ashamed of my faith in Jesus, but embarrassed a lot because of the church behavior.

          so yes, I was talking extremes here…..too much flesh in comparison to the holiness of God.

          many try to do their best.

          others don’t try at all, and get the rest of us in trouble…by giving us a bad image in the sight of the world

  8. All I know: when I look to any Christian’s behavior, including my own as Jesus….;I fall> it did not prevent me from salvation(my eye’s were blinded of others, so I did not have that excuse,) until I believed and saw they were people only saved like me! But looking to others or myself has certainly caused me to stumble many a time through the years.
    Maybe Gandhi wrote the bumper sticker because he chose to stay with his pagan religion, and states he never truly found God. So dying to self as Jesus spoke of and Gandhi are not the same at all! Christians in India would know, being in the same culture, likely persecution.
    In The Word, the Holy Spirit leads and guides us into All righteousness through salvation, then sanctification. Learning the hard way. 1 Way= HIS Way: [consistently] …
    Praise HIS Holy Name~

    • the hopeful point was that if pagans can make some attempt to deny the flesh, then believers, who have the holy spirit, should be able to do the same or better.

  9. Susan,

    “We shall know them (HIS followers) by their fruits: love, joy, peace, patience,longsuffering,goodness, kindness,self control.”

    The Dali Lama has these attributes and Gandhi certainly made a positive impact by applying these attributes without the Holy Spirit. Such are the ways of false teachers.

    The difference between those two men and HIS followers is found in Mark chapter 16 –

    “Later He appeared to the eleven as they sat at the table; and He rebuked their unbelief and hardness of heart, because they did not believe those who had seen Him after He had risen.

    [A follower must believe that He is risen and pride (hardness) does not reside in their heart. God resist the proud.]

    And He said to them, ‘Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature. He who believes and is baptized will be saved; but he who does not believe will be condemned.

    [Then there are these signs, manifestations as testimony of the Power of the Holy Spirit within them.]

    And these signs will follow those who believe: In My name they will cast out demons; they will speak with new tongues; they will take up serpents; and if they drink anything deadly, it will by no means hurt them; they will lay hands on the sick, and they will recover'” (NKJV).

    It takes more than good behavior to be recognized as a follower.

    Paul warns about those with such pleasant/good behavior, “having a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these” (2 Timothy 2:5).

    Psalm 25

    • hopefully, if pagans can die to the flesh, then believers should be able to do it. at least an attempt can be made in that direction.

      • This passage helps me when I don’t attain the Gandhi or Dali Lama level of mentally controlling my flash.

        “And He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me” (2 Corinthians 12:9, NKJV).


    • Hi DJ,
      My spirit & soul agree entirely with the Word of God,(no conflict,) therefore the scriptures you posted affirm and confirm how we shall know Them in addition to bearing the fruits of the Spirit>only from the Holy Spirit. The difference between a believer and “media holy people,” is JESUS.
      We must be born again, we must take up our cross and follow HIM daily…. HE and Only HE is the way the truth the life…
      Amen to your comment, eyes Only on JESUS>>> blessings~

      • DJ,
        actually I was quite disturbed to see Gandhi with quote on this site.

        • susan

          this was my choice to include gandhi…..christians have not cornered the market on goodness yet…..instead of seeing someone as a disturbing pagan, why not try to excel and exceed what he did?

          • Not competing with your site or gandhi on goodness, I am working out my own salvation with fear and trembling >>> Only to Jesus>>> The Word of God. Bless you Marianne.

          • BTY please Read my words in post again; using gandhi as a source for spiritual guidance was what was disturbing, not Gandhi himself, that was not stated.

  10. Matt 24:8-10, 8 All these are the beginning of sorrows. 9 Then shall they deliver you up to be afflicted, and shall kill you: and ye shall be hated of all nations for my name’s sake. 10 And then shall many be offended, and shall betray one another, and shall hate one another.
    after i read the message below from ihop-kc(house of prayers), i felt there are some verses come into my mind. (Matt 24:8-10), in the end time, the true believers will be HATED for our belief. it is very common in the communist country in our time and in the early church – check book of Acts in the bible ,
    Lou Engle ,founder of The CALL, intercessor and church leader ,
    he held prayer meeting at San Diego CA on 2008 , there were more than 30,000 Christians attend the prayer meeting together to repent before God for our American ‘s sin and ask God’s mercy to uphold proposition 8 California to ban same sex marriage. and God hear the cry of those prayers, in that year most of California’s voters did vote to ban the same sex marriage.
    only God can define the marriage, same sex marriage is not a political issue , it is a MORAL issue,
    if we check what happen in Holland and Denmark (Europe), after they legalize gay marriage, right now they are going to legalize incest .
    just like what Sodom and Gomorrah did long time ago.
    main stream media will not report this, we need to search.
    gay activists /lobbist label Lou Engle as “anti-gay” ,”anti-choice”, “right wing person” , they can label Christians anything they want.

    Truth will be tested by Fire, Truth always is Truth .
    it is end time now, let us pray and watch and prepare for our glorious King Jesus second coming.
    below is message from ihop-KC
    Dear Friends and Partners,

    We would like to take a moment to comment on a little-known documentary that was released a year and a half ago, and was deliberately inaccurate and misleading about us.

    This documentary is airing on PBS stations across America tonight. We categorically deny the accusations and insinuations about us in the film. At the same time, we affirm that we love all people, including those who struggle with same-sex attraction (LGBT).

    We stand by the supremacy of God’s Word, even when it is unpopular in our culture. To be clear, our leadership team upholds the New Testament view of the sanctity of sex in the context of marriage between one man and one woman. At the same time, we strongly oppose victimization, violence, and hate against any sector of society that disagrees with this biblical view. We honor the dignity and rights of all who differ from us.

    We unequivocally stand with Lou Engle, whom we have known for many years. We have seen him consistently love, value, and honor people of all backgrounds. Moreover, we are proud of the manner in which he has shown tremendous compassion towards all while maintaining biblical integrity.

    If you would like to know more about our position on this documentary, please read more in our FAQ here »

    Thank you for continuing to stand with us.


    IHOPKC Leadership Team

  11. Susan,


    Jesus is the Word made flesh. He is the way, the truth and the life.

    Psalm 25

    • DJ,
      We are either for HIM or against HIM.

      We serve a jealous God(and rightly so!)

      Reference: The[ entire] Word of GOD…..

      HE Alone Is Worthy~

      Let us Praise HIM!

  12. Wow, this was very powerful and you are absolutely right about being in the flesh. Everyday we should walk in truth and even though we are made of flesh, if Our Father is truly in our hearts and we are led by the Holy Spirit, then that WILL ALWAYS supersede the flesh. And please brothers and sisters, let’s not judge OUR SISTER in the picture. If we really want to help her we need to pray AGAINST the principality of obesity that DWELLS in the air and whose ultimate goal to kill all of humanity. Remember our war is NOT with each other, but AGAINST principalities. There is LIFE AND DEATH in ALL of our tongues. The more that we speak AGAINST people in such a negative way THE MORE that you FUEL THE DEVIL’S kingdom in the second heaven. He makes mocks graves of ALL the people on earth and every time that we do something that works in his favor he vomits on it and put tally marks on it as if it’s a “score” for him. So please be careful of the things that WE SPEAK over other people’s lives. And no I’m not perfect because when I do speak ill of someone else, immediately the Holy Spirit convicts me, I repent for it and move on. And when we repent for the things that we say or do that’s wrong, Our Father in heaven removes the tally mark from the mock graves that Satan has for us. This is the one of the best ways that we can assist Our Father and the angels in spiritual warfare. I love all of you my brothers and sisters and I hope that you continue to walk in truth according to your PERSONAL relationship with the Father cause remember that’s all that matters in the end.

  13. Amen sister! The Holy Spirit is speaking through you~ Bless you Shannon.

  14. I once head a great man say their is a difference between. Self denial, and denial of self. You got to think about it before you get it. I’ve never forgot it.

    Also I love this verse — If God marked all our iniquities who could stand.

    After I read that I looked at other believers in a different light. If you are walking toward God no matter how a baby you are our how much learning you have. You are at least walking toward God not backing up and backsliding. Their are people that have come right to the face of God and quit right their. And the others that are behind them are still moving forward. Who is justified. The one who has not quit walking toward His God.
    I have never forgot this great principal as well. And when I see the complacency of the church today we must leave it up to God. And their Pastor’s who are complacent as well.

    I admit I do not understand why more Christians in American will not stand up for their Jesus. Fight the good fight of Faith. I’m proud to be a Christian. And Im not ashamed of the Gospel of the Lord. He died for us. Yet I have never had my life on the line. But we are going to very soon the way it looks.

    God bless – Beacon

  15. What a beautiful study you have put together on Holiness. May God deeply and richly bless you!

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