Tired

 

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I live here in the silence, wondering when my path will end.

It seems like I only have a short time left.

I do less than I used to do.

I am old now. I never got to be young.

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I have always wondered what it was like to be young, free, happy, and wrapped in a blanket of love.

So many burdens.   So much pain, cruelty and loss. 

So much isolation, and sorrow. So much despair.

Too many battles, with unhappy endings.

And now, the time is gone. All gone.

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I wish I could go back in time, and do it all over, a different way.

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I look in the mirror, only to be disappointed. I see a weary expression.

There are too many lines in my swollen face, and there are dark circles and bags under my eyes.

When I walk, it hurts all over. I move slowly.

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I look out the window, and only see a little.

Most of what I see are memories in my mind.

I listen, and hear less, because most do not speak to me.

All I hear now is my own thoughts.

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Life is not what it used to be. It disappoints me.

But I keep going.

I keep walking the best I can.

My feet and body are bruised and swollen from the journey.

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I have no strength left. I need support, but there is none.

Someday, in heaven, I will rest, and heal.

Heaven will stop my pain, just like it stopped yours.

Then there will be joy.

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Because, I will be able to dance again.

And I will be young for the first time.

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Let us both remember Life, as it could have been. 

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