The Charismatic Male Jezebel – Conquest by Romance and Assimilation
Characteristics
1. He comes on strong, sweeping his victims off their feet. He can be a “hot, passionate lover.” Women are flattered by his intense attention of them, and excited by his male dominant approach to sex. He sexually “adores” them in Romeo fashion.
2. He targets them by falsely mirroring their values, interests, goals, philosophies, tastes and habits. He is “everything you are.” Wow, you have so much in common! You are a too perfect match !
2. He fakes integrity, honesty and sincerity. He convincingly mimics human emotions. He uses people. He is a “sincere liar.”
3. He can seem very spiritual or idealistic, but this is superficial. His interpretation of scripture, however, may not agree with what God had in mind.
4. He can suddenly play the role of the victim. Similar to the sneaky charming jezebel. Victims take pity on him. They see him as needing them. He is playing on the natural nurturing character of women.
5. He can inspire the woman to attack those who are supposed to be victimizing him. This causes injury to innocent people, and hurts the woman’s relationships with others. Her friends and family can be alienated from her in this way.
6. He wants to marry victims quickly. Impulsive. He wants his victims dependent on him. He portrays false integrity, appears helpful, comforting, generous.
7. The fake sincerity does not last as he starts to change into his true self. He will have numerous romantic relationships. He has no loyalty to anyone except his own body parts.
8. He blames others in the relationship. His victims are objectified and disposable.
9. His lack of conscience is shocking, incomprehensible and emotionally painful to the victim. He can suddenly end the relationship, without any compassion. The woman victim is quickly discarded as he cultivates a “new perfect partner”. Or she may be able to end the relationship, and salvage what she can.
10. He may drop verbal clues about his true character early in the relationship, but victims fail to grasp its meaning. He romances them as he romances others, to exploit what stimulation he can out of each one. Victims are too enraptured with all the sexual attention, to realize that is all he is giving them.
11. Eventually the unmasked Jezebel emerges. His targets suffer emotional and financial devastation and their emotional recovery is lengthy.
12. He will recruit others as he condemns you for being a failure to him. Expect people he knows to gang up on you.
13. Nothing is his fault.
14. You can suffer and die, and he will not care. Maybe he will “pray” for you. This is insulting, at the least.
15. In a church setting, he can be the perfect Christian. Everyone will idealize him and promote him. He may end up as an elder in the church, or a pastor, or in some position of authority. He is so charming that everyone is impressed with him. He is a man’s man, and the kind of man that women secretly admire.
16. When you start having problems with him, he will have the church “pray for you.” He is projecting his sin onto you, and condescending to you. You will be the sinner, lost, and in need of deliverance, not him. He has the demon, but you will get the bad reputation. He slanders successfully.
17. The Jezebel man is not an Ahab (see other posts for this). The Jezebel is a spirit of control and rebellion. The devil comes to steal, kill, and destroy. The Ahab is a permissive spirit, that just lets the devil have his way.
18. Jezebels are cruel, dishonest, controlling and critical, when they show their true colors.
What to do about him:
Abandon your efforts to help or cure him.
His true mask exposed and the false character he portrayed is gone forever.
Accept the reality. He does not want to change. Any “I will change” is a lie.
Seek therapy. Seek prayer and support. You are the only one that will want help. He is not concerned. He can get another woman using the same methods he got you.
Ignore and don’t react to his hurtful words. It is not your fault that you are not good enough for him. Do not let him blame you for the break up.
Don’t take the bait when he blames or lies. They fool even trained professionals. Check out what he says. Get proof.
Do not be vulnerable or naive. Check out his past before you get involved with any man. Look at how he treats others.
Prepare for a nasty divorce. He will slander you.
Accept no abuse. Respect yourself. Learn to fight back.
Do your homework before getting involved with someone. How does he treat other people? How does he treat his mother and sister? What does his father think of him? How does he get along with relatives? Co-workers?
Do you hear many complaints from him about them? Do they complain about him? Does he lie? Does he take advantage of people? Does he respect others?
Look at your own weaknesses that let him in. If you allowed the sex without the real love, then you need to work on that. Check your own value system and morals. He took advantage of your willingness to compromise your values. Work to correct your weaknesses. Close the door to his type.
Understand the biblical principle of bad tree = bad fruit, and good tree = good fruit. If you are not sure about the tree, look at the fruit. Before a woman gets deeply involved with any man, his behavior and moral character should be carefully examined.
Learn about sociopathic behavior.
For the conflict oriented Jezebel man – Spirit of War.
….Click here for more.
For the Jezebel Pastor / Minister …….Click here for more
See also the rest of the Jezebel Series, including the Female Jezebels…….Click here for more.




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The Jezebel Man - the charismatic lover « Heaven Awaits said this on March 30, 2008 at 5:27 pm |
Oh my goodness, this is such a timely word. My ex-husband fits this description almost entirely. The only reason I was looking this up was he was telling me that God told him that I needed deliverance from the Jezebel spirit. Basically, I married him because he TOLD me everything I wanted to hear, that we were going to serve God together as a married couple AND life the lifestyle I always wanted. I remember saying to God that he was even more PERFECT for me that I remember asking God for in a husband. I was sure I was in God’s will by marrying him. And we had many prophetic words confirming this. That has been the struggle for me to let go of him, plus the fact that he constantly professes his desire to “change” and “get his life straightened out”. He only repents “generally”, he says things like “forgive me for my actions and words”, and can NOT state the exact trespasses and then says “Jesus can forgive me, why can’t you?”.
The fact that I am still attracted to him, very much physically is definitely explained in this article. I have said many times that he is trying to be “God” to me…..my perfect lover, my protector, my teacher, my provider, the fulfillment of my destiny.
Thank you for your revelation, and may God continue to reveal his TRUTH and LIGHT!
Colleen
HI Colleen,
I am glad this has helped you. I would consider the male Jezebel a much stronger force than the female Jezebel, who can be broken by a strong male figure.
Inherent manipulation, dishonesty, and insincerity will never allow the male Jezebel to become a real husband to any woman, no matter how attractive he is.
He does not know who he is, and needs to control everyone’s opinion of him, in order to present himself as perfect. He cannot be sincere. It is just not in him. It is like he has no soul. He speaks empty words.
I have a friend who was married to one. It is 20 years later, and he still has not changed from the divorce. Since he cannot admit he is ever wrong, they were driving together, and he caused an accident.
When the police came, he blamed her for the accident, and he was so convincing, that he got away with it. Now the insurance will not pay her for the injuries she received.
This is someone only God and a supernatural disaster can cure.
OMW this describes exactly a male I knew a few years back.
I luckily after a few years realised he had a demon inside him as his eyes even changed when the spirit took over and had the good sense to leave very far away and have nothing to do with this person as he is beyond help. very predatory nature. I infact thoought he had many demons not just one but this Jezebel spirit sums it up.
it took me many years to ” heal” from all the abuse, but realised
he was sick and not me. this article has actually helped me shut the door completely. i do recognize that his mother had a huge part to play in this so I am looking forward to your post on the Jezebel mother. Thank you for the eye opener.
Bee,
These men are very attractive and alluring, and their attention makes us feel so special and loved. However, the results are tragic. I can understand your wounds.
marianne
Marianne it’s good to identify sinful behavior and address how to deal with it, that will always be helpful information. But I have to address the extreme harm when you catergorize ‘control’ ‘rebellion’ ‘condescension’ ‘slander’ as “female sin” or “female spirit”. This is an attack against the value and worth of women who are created in God’s Image. Sin does not discriminate between gender, men and women are equally vulnerable to all sin and are equally accountable to God.
Not only does Christ teach no such thing, but it spreads the lie that women are dirty, not to be trusted, they are to be silent, and a host of ungodly oppression.
Diane,
I am not saying that the ‘control’ ‘rebellion’ ‘condescension’ ’slander’ as “female sin” or “female spirit”. I am not attacking women as having unique sins. I am talking about men here, as also being capable of doing the same thing.
I did not originate this term. I just use it because people know what I mean.
In reality, there are wicked women, and there are wicked men. I just try to describe their behavior to help warn others so they will not be hurt by them. I use whatever terminology is available to help them understand the concepts.
The term Jezebel does accurately describe a real historical figure. She was a witch. When someone acts like a witch, they might get this label. It is Jezebel’s fault she acted this way, not others who use her name now.
I do see differences in the way men and women behave in general. Men are more confrontational, and women are more subtle. Men are more physical, women are more emotional. Men are more worldly, women are more spiritual.
God bless you
marianne
Marianne
I am aware of reality. Sin is not male or female, but it is rebellion against God. We agree…there are wicked men and women. The fact that you are aware of that but choose to catergorize certain sins female and male (it doesn’t matter whose name you use) is wrong.
Rebellion in children is not Jezebel it is sin. repent
Rebellion in pastors is not Jezebel it is sin. Christ says REPENT
Rebellion in the workplace is not Jezebel it is sin. REPENT
HI MARIANNE. i just had to comment on your understandin and it is only my opinion but i strongly disagree with your interpretation of a “jezebel” spirit.after i read it.i could only recognize that either a “jezebel” spirit dwells within you and you’re not aware of what is takin place or thrtr is a “jezebel” spirit very close to you cuz only a “jezebel” spirit would use this type of deception.you are in danger and you need to be cleared of this type of thinkin which can ultimately destroy you.MAY GOD BLESS YOU WITH TRUE WISDOM AND KNOWLEDGE OF GOD’S WORD
Wow I have expereinced this type and have suffered great emotional pain. It is very confusing though because at one point he comes off as being very sweet and it’s like you get sucked in and then you feel like your so in love with him and he’s telling you no I dont want a reationship with you, but wants to suck you dry. I am still trying to break away, this site has been so helpful. I thought I was the one who was crazy. The part that hit me the most was that you feel like you never good enough, that has really done damage to my self-esteem and confidence as a woman. Thank You for posting this now I can work on getting away and getting healed and will hopefully recognize any future disasters.
Shelia,
I pray the best for you. You are NOT the problem…… he is.
You ARE good enough, but he isn’t.
I pray that you find someone who is worthy of your devotion.
Love
marianne
This is my son-in-law and my Daughter has the Ahab spirit, this spirit has emotionally and financially devistated me and ended the relationship I have with my daughter and grandchildren. He is in authority in my old church and everyone is fooled. He didn’t fool me and thats why I am under his attack
Hi joyce,
This is a real rough situation. It will be a long struggle, because your daughter will not “see” anything wrong. Try to get friends and family to back you up. You will need to do a lot of prayer on this. Expect it to take a long time, but do not give up.
He needs to be confronted alone, with you and your backup there. Your daughter should NOT be there, if you can manage that. She will just stick up for him.
It is a divide and conquer situation. He gets strength by recruiting others. You have to fight with the same weapons.
I will keep you in prayer.
blessings
marianne
marianne i have been following your site on and off for 2 years now and i too am dealing with the male jezebel spirit this is being spoke of and im still dealing with him and if it were not my faith in God i would be out of mind right now we use to live together until i left and i attempted to leave several times under the pretense that he would change and stop the abuse.but he never changed and mind you that the home in which we resided was my family home that my grandfather built from the ground however he as well as the rest of my immediate family are deceased and i was the only left to stay there.the guy im speaking of moved in and basically took over im emotionally destroyed by this spirit and am in recovery and homeless and he continues to think that i was and still is GOD told me to leave it with HIM FOR HE IS THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN FIX IT AND HE DOES NOT LIE.im pregnant with his (supposedly) only child and some how i thought would change him but then realized that having his child wouldnt change him but that
God would have to change him otherwise he would still be the same person only worse so i will continue to let God be God and let him continue to work on me no matter how hard or how bad it may hurt JOY COMES IN THE MORNIN i consider your site therapy GOD BLESS
Cheryl
The baby will not change him.
In fact, your baby will also become his victim.
if this is your property, then you have the right to tell him to leave.
If he does not, then you can call the police.
There are plenty of nice / nicer men out there who would be better for you.
Do not waste the best years of your life with a jezebel.
Jezebels do not change. And you permitting him to continue will just reinforce his behavior.
God might fix him, but it does not mean you have to be there for it, or that he is the right one for you.
I know it is hard when there is a baby involved…….but this is a difficult decision, and a but scary for you.
If you just trust God, you can make it without him.
An exact description of the man I got married to 6 years ago. He has been doing a horrible destruction in my life (finances, emotions, self esteem, etc.). I managed to move separately from him 6 months ago, we have been attending counselling since then at church. The counsellor dealing with our case got to the consequence that he would need psychiatric treatment. He would insist on me, but does not want to change. According to my church I have no biblical reason for divorce, so I have been waiting for a miracle from God, being 36 years old, having no children yet (he did not want any children, in spite of promising before we got married). He has been ruining my reputation in our church, telling lies about me and saying that I have the Jezebel spirit… I have been going through difficult times, but I will not give up my dream that God will restore my life.
Thank you for this site, it is very helpful!
Hi Silvia,
This is such an unfortunate situation. The man here could channel his negative energies into positive ones, and be an ideal partner. But to go the opposite direction is disaster.
It is typical not to want to change. There are too many advantages to him to stay the way he is. Him accusing you of having the Jezebel spirit is also typical. He is passing the blame to you, so he can look innocent.
I do not know if you can convince the pastor who is counseling you both, but he must admit what he is. You also need to tell the pastor that this is a spiritual issue, and that a psychiatrist will either see nothing wrong, or say it is hopeless. Psychiatry is based on godless humanism, and has nothing to offer you.
This is because this is a spirit, not an organic mental disorder. Confession and rejection of the spirit is the only way to remove it. Your pastor seems to want to pass this off onto another counselor. So, you either need to enlighten your pastor, so he can do a better job, or find a deliverance pastor that understands the dark spirit realm, and will work to deliver your husband of the spirit.
Let me know what happens next.
blessings
marianne
Marianne,
Actually it was the pastor’s wife, who came up with the idea, that he might have the Jezebel spirit, after he started accusing me of having it. He also shows other strange symptoms like addiction of collecting unnecessary things, playing with his hair and shaking his hands without being aware of doing it. He is very irresponsible (he did not work at all for years and made me keep him), he was willing to take a shower once in 2-3 weeks, after me asking him to do so several times. He also have problems with concentrating (he seems to listen to you when you are talking to him, but later it turns out that he was not getting at all what you told him). That is why the pastor suggested that he might need to see a phycatrist in our church, but he almost run out of the room in anger when hearing that. It is probable, that he has a combination of a mental disorder and demonic problems (the pastor also thinks that).
He has been abusing me verbally from the beginning and the abuse got more intense since we got separated. A few days ago, after a horrible quarrel the pastor suggested him not to communicate with me until things improve. Shame on me or not, I am very happy with this idea and living without him, without that constant stress, abuse and abandonment is like a dream. I know that I need emotional healing.
All I can do is working on the restoration of my self-esteem, my relationships, my identity in Christ, and wait on God to do a miracle. I will keep you informed but I am prepared for a long process.
Blessings
Silvia
Hi Silvia
At first I thought he was just an uncaring husband, but the extra details you give are insightful.
He sounds like what I call a crashed spirit. There has been some damage to his spirit sometime in the past, and he basically cannot cope with it, so he just becomes nonfunctional. It is similar to a nervous or mental breakdown. All systems just come to a stop. he cannot deal with any responsibility, because he is just not capable. There is an emotional injury, and repressed anger over that injury. The stress has caused physiological damage. His hands shaking may be due to the stress being released, and a thyroid that is overworked. His accusations may be the result of a paranoia, that originated from the need to protect himself after he was hurt.
Even with rest, it may take years to recover. He has a damaged spirit, and apparently he was taking his problems out on you. So it is good you are separate now.
I still do not believe in psychiatrists. They just listen, and do not help, unless they think putting him on drugs is the answer. Psychiatrists do not understand spiritual problems. If he gets put on drugs, he will never get the root cause healed. He does need deliverance, and christian counseling also.
In all this, you are the other victim. So take care of yourself.
First, your husband should be seen by a regular medical doctor, to check for illness, tumors, etc. He may be referred to a neurologist. If that turns out negative, then focus on going back to what injured him originally. I sense some form of abuse somewhere.
blessings
marianne
Marianne,
Many thanks for your reply!
English is not my first language, so may be I did not express myself clearly, I am sorry. I mean shaking hands that he moves them like trying to adjust his watch on his wrist or the sleeve of his pullover. He does that when eating at the table, like trying to shake morsels off his fingers. These look like nervous habits, not shaking hands like an alcoholic has. When he plays with his hair, he grabs a mop of hair on the top of his head and twists it around with one of his fingers. He usually does that when thinking and only at home. He had a difficult childhood in a disfuncional home, with a verbally and physically agressive father. This might be the background of the abuse you suspect.
Hi Silvia
I sounds like he is more emotionally damaged than you are, so just remember that. It is obvious that you are not happy with this sort of situation, for good reasons. The best thing you can do is see that he gets spiritual help, and then pray for him to recover. From what I can tell, from your descriptions, he has deep feelings of shame and frustration (manifested as anger). He needs to sit down and get all his embarrassing and hurtful memories discussed, so he can start to heal.
blessings
marianne
My husband is everything you discribed, he has ruined my credit,had borrowed mony from my parents, and I cought him recently cheating again. This time he just left me and my son to deal with things owed and the houuse. He just took clothes and had me deal with house. I think my son deserves a solid family, I am praying for him, but am I suppose to let him treat and talk to me the way he does, or am I suppose to stand up for myself? I want our family to heal. But how am I suppose to respond to my husband to come back home?
Hi Dh
Do you want him back? Cheating indicates something more serious than just irresponsiblity toward bills. He is out of control.
Will he change? That is what you first have to decide.
if you do want him back?:
If he will not change, then tell him he cannot come back unless he agrees not just to change his behavior, but to get professional help. If he agrees, make sure he does not have a female counselor, but a male, so he cannot manipulate.
This is not just something to “appease” you. This is something where you will be in charge of his life, until he learns to start acting like a real man, and not just a jerk, running around like a hormone hurricane, having sex with whatever he sees. You will be the strong one, in charge, until he gets his act together.
He needs to learn that he is not that much of a catch for any woman, if she has to change his diapers, and take care of him.
Cheating issue
He will have to make a clean break with the woman. And YOU will be there when he does this. (Bring a girlfriend of yours as a witness.) If he wants reunion with you, then YOU (unfortunately) are in charge, since HE is out of control.
Deliverance:
If you do not have a church, find one that believes in deliverance. Contact the pastor AND his wife and ask for a counseling session. Tell them he has lust problems, and need prayer and counseling to get to the root of his problem. The idea behind this group structure is that there will be 3 people in the room with him. 2 females, and one male.
The females outnumber the males, because even many male pastors can be too lenient toward men who cheat, since it is a “male thing.” Your husband is outnumbered, and will have a harder time trying to fake it, and manipulate.
He should set up set times to pray with you and the pastor, so he stays in line.
Money:
If he wants money, he needs to get a job. He is not staying there rent free. If he wants to come home, he will have to work and support you. Right now, he might just want to go back in dependency mode.
Your son.
Explain to him that his father has emotional problems. And do not imitate him! You will have to watch him, since he may learn negative behaviors from his father, until the father is better. Help your son understand the situation, and be a part of the solution.
see if any of this helps
blessings’
marianne
Hi Marianne,
Nice site, I do agree with a lot of things you said. However, it cannot be generalized of all christian because, you know , not all men are perfect, and Christian men some of them do really produce the fruits of the spirit, that can be “mistaken as jezebel”, because they are indeed sincere, kind, loving and take interest in several areas that some women may also have. So it may look “too perfect” to some women. So this may turn into wrongly accusing that man of being insincere, when he is being really sincere to the woman and helping her or love her.
Because often relationships are formed or are born when a man and woman DO have many things in common, tastes, interests, philosphies, out look etc. It is natural. But in genuine love the man really loves the woman and yes, and builds her up in every possible way in Christ. not break her down.
So its very important to Discern than Judge just on “outward signs”, because sometimes “outward signs” can be misleading and can lead to predjuding who other wise may turn out to be genuine and good people who can be a really good husband to you and the person God wanted you to meet.
Best to go by the leading of the Spirit of God.
Hi AS
If you look at the links from this post to others about Jezebel, you will find more negative traits. Your comment made me think I needed to add some of that material her on this page.
Jezebels are also cruel, dishonest, controlling, and critical. So, the behavior is a good clue, and informed people should be able to tell the difference. Once informed, it will be easy to tell the difference between a wonderful man and a Jezebel man.
These are the same arguements, and sentences Jezebel women use to “undermine” sincere men and isolate them and drive them out. Isn’t it Marianne?
You want all men show atleast one “evil trait” openly to women ? What if there are sincere and good men?
what if Jesus stood before these women and dispalyed
1. Sincerety
2. True love
3. GEntleness
4. Interest in philosophy,compassion
5. Unworldly and caring
Any woman would call him “here we go, deciever”.
Is it safe to judge someone based on these “signs” ? Marianne?
What if there are real men, who may have had tough childhoods, and yet God has transformed them, or who had good strong values. I know men who grew up in broken homes, broken and abusive homes, yet they decided and chose to be good men, they decided to follow their heart and continue on to be sincere, caring, empathetic, and when they met Jesus, they were enhanced further by His mercy and transformed for the better.
I can give you several men from history, who were not Christians yet were good men. Imagine them how much is a Christian ?
Women who get hurt by men must learn to forgive, and learn to judge each man by his fruits, not by seeking him to be “imperfect” or “perfect” , rather see, what God has done in their lives.
If we find faults in people we will find faults, if we go and seek and try to find good things in people, we will find atleast some good traits.
Creating suspcion in the mind of women against sincere or good men, only leads women to accept “wicked men”. I have noticed this in my life time. I am still “young” less than 30 years old, yet I saw, all the women in church want to be with a man who “drinks” or “clubs” or has some “wicked trait”, they get a kick, they get some sort of addiction to such men. Yet I notice all the single men in church are the good guys. Sincere guys, who really care, and may “display” all these “signs” that you said, and yet are not Jezebels. Many of them are good looking, may of them have interest in many good things, many of them are emotional. Was not Jesus emotional ? He wept at Lazarus death. Wasn’t he compassionate when he said “I wish to gather you like a hen gathers its chicks”. to a modern person, Jesus sounded like a sissy and gay, but he wasn’t .He embodied the perfect man.
A man who may have suffered in his life is perhaps in a BETTER state to understand the woman who suffered in HER life, in a better way and empathize with her. Understand her, so that in each other, both incomplete people can be complete.
It always takes two people to work the relationship well. That is why I tell people, do not prejudge, but DISCERN in the Spirit. I have seen too many women “pre-judge”, oh he is too perfect, so i can’t trust him.
What then do they expect us to be? wicked?
And I also believe that a true man who also has the traits as mentioned above, but not a jezebel, will own up to HIS mistakes, and accept them. Not just blame it all on someone else. However, there is no need for him to accept the mistakes of a “jezebel” women.
Each one owns up to his portion.
If someone comes and asks such a man and says “have you hurt a woman in the past?”
The man says “yes, I have hurt a woman. and I had sinned”.
Has that woman ever hurt you?
The man says honestly “yes, she has”.
Has he blamed anyone? no. He has answered honestly. And in each cutlure things differ. A white woman cannot simply prejudge a man who say comes from south korea. He may have different attitudes to that of a white man, and may seem much pleasant, then he should not be mistaken to have a jezebel spirit”.
I don’t want to go on the defensive of such men, rather I wish to question all the rationale being used to judge someone based on just “outward ” signs, that can be too dangerous and lead to a witchunt of people.
Once you have met a Jezebel spirit and you see him unmask, you will not be able to deny the horrid spirit in which you see. I just pray that none of you ever have to deal with the nasty Jezebel. If you even think for a second, that you may have encountered this spirit, do as Marianne has suggested and break all ties immediately! This spirit loves to destroy the prophetic and targets God’s chosen. The male Jezebel is the strongest demonic spirit, that I have ever encountered. I have been doing much research on this spirit lately, and I have unfortunately also been a victim of the Charismatic Male Jezebel. Listen to the Holy Spirit, as he will guide you in descerning the person in question. Don’t fall victim to the Jezebel spirit, the result is devastating.
I have lifed my hole life as a male prisoner of the demon Jezebel but i was freed by the blood of Jesus Christ, Amen. I was basicly a sexual predator, feeding on the most innocent girls who never went to church and was therefore pretty unprotected. Every girl i shagged got the demon themselves after having intercourse whit me. It worked pretty much like AIDS. I fucked them so i could get their innocence inside of me since i never had any myself. It was a nasty way of living and im so glad i have finally been set free. And this is a message to every person who is living whit Jezebel right now: You might have the time of your life in the beginning but trust me eventually the demon is gonna turn on you and you are going to wish you were dead. I allmost died in the disentegrating process and it was the worst time of my life. Everyone answers to the Lord in the end and trust me there is a hell far worst than the one on earth, and i know cus i allmost ended up there myself. Praise The Lord
Hi Axel
Thank you for your brave testimony. I hope you are ok now.
I am ashamed to say this discribes me in every way. I thought i was going crazy but i now know I am not.
I hate the way i am and am ashamed to be posting on here.
I was praying for help and the words Jezebel spirit popped into my head. So I googles and came across this site.
I know I need to stay out of relationships but its like an addiction for me. I truely believe I am addicted to the strong emotion and the drama.
What do I do…please help me.
dear Pete
You are on the right path, and there is hope, if you can see this.
Understand that you will never be happy unless you have real, true love. Lust does not satisfy, except for a minute.
Go back to your childhood. Look for the wound that started this.
Pray about it.
Take action to mend the wound.
I will put you on my prayer list.
I know what the wound is just not what to do about it…
The only time I’ve ever felt true love was when i was married and I threw that away in an affair with a woman who turned out to be a witch. My life has been out of control ever since. I hate what I do to other woman…. I try my best to stay away from them but I keep failing.
dear pete,
what was the wound?
By the way, when you get a message like this from the website, you will be able to hit the reply button, and talk to me off line.
Marianne I am a slain victim of this spirit. I would Like to share my testimony so it might help someone and maybe someone could help me. I am in need of healing. This spirit captivated me stole my identity strength character values self esteem education relationships my heart but thank God it didn’t steal my soul… I had to plead and plead with the man to let me go and he still showed no mercy and insisted that he did no wrong it was unbelievable. I am terrified. Everything- sweeping, false mirroring,faking, playing the role of the victim impulsive, blaming me for trying to love him or get him in a commitment, withholding affection I am emotionally and financially devastated and I am scared for the future. I am scared that if he comes back even though he agreed that he wont I cant stand up to him. Its like the alluring changes me into what it wants. And I am a woman of God, annointed prophet and I just can’t believe the severity of this attack and the disallusionment I was under. All he ever gave me was sex and it messed me up. How can someone show such feeling and not actually have any? The man did raise up from the spirit though and asked me “don’t you want me?” in the middle of I can’t commit I would drive you crazy i don’t want to cut grass– I know it sounds strange. He agreed to let me go to find someone who loves me and takes care of me but he is tormented by this spirit so please pray for me and for him. I know I will find the strength i need but this demon will destroy him totally eventually. I thank God for the protection I had during this because it could have been worse and the spirit became unmasked to me. In Jesus name I pray that this man comes to brokeness and repents. Thank You for helping others -this is serious warfare. Where is the spirit of Jehu in this?
Dear Crystal
You have to look for a Jehu to find one. I would suggest finding a righteous, Christian older couple who would come across as parent figures to you.
You need to have someone to confide in. The older man would be the Jehu, and the woman would provide balance, as well as a mother figure.
You need to go back into your childhood, and find out why you are attracted to this kind of person.
You may also be under your own spirit of deception. From observation, 99.9 % of people who tell me they are prophets, are false ones, but they have been convinced by false church propaganda that they are prophets.
This leads to speaking from one’s imagination and/or learning to “read” people. People who fall for this are usually insecure, and want to feel more important in their lives, and this false prophecy gives them status and acceptance. THink about it. If you were a real prophet, you would have really heard from God about this man, and avoided him.
So, repent of any false prophecy spirit, even though it is a popular thing to “be” in the church, and find the spirit of Truth, and submit yourself. The best thing you can be for God is NOT a prophet, but a “nothing.” He will then be able to use you. Jesus is your Jehu.
I am in awe after reading this information. A month after I married my husband, I had to seperate from him because of all of the issues that began to surface. Every single characteristic you named he has it. I tried to divorce and he begged me not too and after 2 years of going back and forth to court, the Holy Spirit told me to drop the divorce. I was angry at first and cried and sought God about this. He simply told me to forgive and pray for him. I did my best to forgive and prayed sparingly and continued to live seperately from him. This year the Lord challenged me and asked if I was going to pray or let go of this marriage…He gave me the choice. I decided to fight and be consistent and asked what I was dealing with and I clearly heard the Holy Spirit say Jezebel. This is how I found your site! A week ago, I had a personal visitation from the Lord himself, He told me that my husband would come home but not now and then he gave me a scripture Daniel 11:35 which speaks of a person being afflicted by God so that they may be cleansed, refined and purified and then the appointed time would come. I don’t blame anyone for not wanting to fight for a marriage to a person with a Jezebel spirit but if you do, there is hope if you have faith in God. We just have to understand the warfare is spiritual and not allow this principality to pull you into natural (carnal) fights! God is already moving at this moment my husband is in the process of being evicted from his condo, has 4 vehicles and every single one of them stopped working and he and his mistress have been fighting constantly lately. I expect the Lord to give me victory and I will update you concerning our progression. May the Lord bless you and keep us in your prayers.
hi carmen
Thank you for your comments and story. I hope the best for you. I will put you on my prayer list.
hi carmen.
I believe I am going through the same thing. The holy spirit convicted me and told me to comre back to this page becsuse I never read Marrianne’s reply. God Bless You I knoe exactly what you are going through. The holy spirit told me that I was praying for him for the wrong reasons because he hurt me. When I should be praying for the conditionthat he is in. See my guy did come back and say I am not good to you likethis I need some time alon to think things through ansd then I want to come back to you and be with you. This tore me up because if Satan filled me with every kind of negative thought about myself and so much hatred for him. When I know I am saved and walking right with the Lord- I submitted my life to Christ years ago. So thank you Lord for the confirmation. This has been one of the hardest things to go through because he came to me…(with a girlfriend)… please just love me ..please.. please… we broke up, shes mean… Everything. I never wanted to hurt anyone and anyway its been hard because I have felt so betrayed so used not knowiung if he went back what hes doing. But one day he called me and was so hateful I don’t want a coommitment… blah, blah I just got out of a rtelarionship..but I really do care about you and this song came on by Brit Speasrs called “Sometimes.” Its been stuckin my mind eversince. Pray for me because I knowits spiritual warfare and i know he is in trouble and he just added to the long list of JUDAS’s in my life. People that say they care aboutme but aren’t here for me. I just hope he really meant what he said about needing alone time and he does reach out and grab hold of the kingdom of heaven and gets convicted and a new heart for the LORD. I haven’t seen him in about 3 mos now and I basically just sent him a text and said I lovve u will always love u but Iknow the best gift I can give u is to let u be alone and i will pray 4 u. Its hard not to be bitter because he pulled me in an binnocent bystander trying to take care of my kids alone finish my education and it was hard enough without a broken heart. I pray that he comes to realize what he is doing to himself and the hurt he has brought on others and I atleast want an apology but would like for him to commit and really love me when he gets delivered- he does have some really good qualities and with his past experioences his testimony could bring alot of people to Christ,
Battling a Jezebel spirit, especially in a male, is a very vicious one. I wouldn’t even suggest for anyone to take on this battle unless they knew God wanted them too. If God be for you, He is more than the world (including Jezebel) against you. This Jezebel spirit will search out every wound and hurt you have and use it against you to bring more pain. It is important to stay close to God because he is your protector and healer. I have to keep very little contact with my husband at this time because of his jezebellic condition and continue to allow the Lord to bring circumstances into his life that will destroy the pride and arrogance in him. Since my last post, he is still losing his material possessions, one by one. You can’t focus on the man or else you will be pulled and drawn into jezebel’s kingdom, it’s not worth it. I thank God every day for the victorious end and love Him because He is my first husband and loves me more than any man ever could.
how did god personally visit you carmen?
A friend and I was in worship, we got quiet and suddenly I felt love that I have never felt before. My friend said, He is here, and when I turned my chair around, the Lord (Jesus himself) was standing there. He shared some personal things with us about our futures and encouraged us and then He left.
that is a beautiful experience.
Thanks!!!
my next question is for marianne-
I really have been praying for God to move in his life and since I have been majorly hit or under spiritual sttack. Will you please pray for me and my family and give me some advice.
hi crystal
My advice is to keep praying and fellow shipping as you are doing now.
We all would like to see loved ones healed so we can quickly reunite with them.
but it does not always work that way.
Sometimes it is a very long wait, and you have to put it all in God’s hands.
lead your life the best way you can, be loving toward others, and be wise in your choices regarding relationships, friends, etc.
do not isolate yourself. Find quality people and share with them.
you need to heal also.
Your jezebel will take a long time to come around (they don’t like to repent), so you need to develop patience.
Spend time helping others, and doing good.
Develop your self socially and spiritually so you you grow stronger each day.
See the good that God sees in you, and love yourself.
HElP! My beautiful chrisitan daughter, a 22 year old college student has now been “captured” by one of these male jezebel preditors. He has boldly come into my house and convinced her to leave with him to live with him 2 states away. He is handsome, smooth, and convincing. He has now 2 failed marriages and is 12 years older than her. He has now seperated her from family and friends. MY daughter has only had 2 boyfriends and has mande a covenant with GOD when she was 18 NOT to have pre-marital sex. I am a certifed nurse-midwife and womnes’ minister. I have openly shared with my daughter the consequences of getting together with such a man and all the devestation that I have seen o ver 25 years of taking care of and ministering to women. She has refused to listen to me and others regarding this man and what is driving him. He told her that “God told him to bring her to his house”. He has her convinced that he is a chrisitan and that all his other failed marriages and relationships were not his fault, but the women who “left him”. She has not been herself since she has bee seeing him. She only listens to him and believes everything he says. She is not communicating with me. He has taken her 2 states away where she has no friends or family and no support but him. What can I do????
dear Lavonne
Being 2 states away makes it difficult, and she is also of legal age to decide to leave with him.
You will have to take an aggressive position, and do not change it. This does not mean an unloving stance.
1. tell her she is wrong, he is a fraud
2. tell her you will pray for her, and the door is open to come home.
3. be consistent in telling her, if you can, what god says about this sort of relationship, and that she needs to see herself as God sees her right now
4. make sure you tell her you love her, and want her safe again.
5. pray for her, and get others to join you.
6. if any of her friends have contact with her, have them do the same thing you do.
7. this is assuming you still have phone contact….keep the doors open.
I will put you on my prayer list.
Where did they move to?
He has a house andjob in Farmington, New Mexico. His father, step-mom, and sister also live there. He has few friends which is understandable considering his know it all arrogance. I have spoken with our friend and his ex-wife who is a mess now. She feels betrayed and has an unbelievable story. He wanted an “open marriage” with her and even offer for her to be “the other woman” after he divorced her. Under the guise of seeking biblical counseling, he got her to agree to meet with an associate Pastor in the large evangelical church they occassionally attended. That proved to be a “gang up ” on her (no women present). She is now not sure there evenis a God. I spent 2 hours on the phone with her. She also told me about the other women that he has destroyed. Of course, my daughter is so brain-washed and deceived by him that she would not listen to sound advice or even consider that he might be a fraud. He is very handsome, smooth, and is adept at finding the weak areas in people. I have not heard from her and am praying that he does not convince her to change her phone number. This whole situation is so unlike anything that she has ever done that I find it unbelievable. I have several prayer warrior friends that are interceeding for her.
His sister does not speak to him because of the things that he did to his previous wife. They are still friends. Thank youso much for you prayers for her. I am praying that God will move swiftly and that she will be protected, body, soul, and spirit. Please let me know if there is anything else that I can do. My husband and I are trying to gather all the information on him that we can at the present time.
thank you for publishing this. sadly, it is a perfect picture of my husband. i was delivered of a jezebel spirit myself, in 2002 and since then, i have had a string of controlling men (friends, mostly because i rarely dated) who have caused me many deep emotional hurts. my husband and i have only been married 14 months and we have filed for divorce, but are waiting on the court. thankfully, we have no children together, but i am having such confusion about whether divorce is my only option. you seem to think that a woman cannot oust jezebel in her husband, based on authority, as if the only hope is to run away, like elijah did. i hope you are wrong. i have come to an understanding that i have more spiritual authority, based on the blood of Jesus, and have decided that i will pray against this spirit in my husband. i know this is a potentially dangerous place to be, confronting her head on. at this point, all i can do is hold tight to Jesus, which is the safest place i can be in this battle. in some ways, this battle isn’t really about my marriage, but about freeing myself from the constant stream of controlling people through my life. it’s time jezebel took her eviction from my life seriously so that the prophetic call God put on my life can be realized. finding your site was just a first step in this journey. i needed to know i wasn’t crazy for thinking such a “nice” guy was a sociopath. thanks again.
dear SaltyAppleSara
It is not impossible for a female to cast out a male jezebel spirit but it is extremely hard, even with the blood of Jesus.
Female spirits will bow to male authority, but a male, even in normal society, does not bow to a female. Males do not view females as having authority over them.
So you have to get past the bias of the host person, to get to the jezebel spirit inside of them. True deliverance is based on a free will repentance, and acceptance of deliverance. You cannot force it.
Normally a male host enjoys the residence of the jezebel spirit because it gives him what he wants, and you are actually trying to bring about a deliverance that is against his will.
As long as he gives permission for the spirit to be there, it does not have to leave. You will exhaust yourself, and nothing will happen.
Somehow, his will has to change. Usually, some “disaster” hits him, and this wakes him up. Then he is open to deliverance.
But like I said, it is not impossible.
I know several former male jezebels.
One was actually possessed by a demon. Once it was his will for it to be gone, it left, after he rejected it. Now, he is free. It took major tragedy to jolt him (death of wife and children), and have him realize more major losses were coming (only one child left).
For yourself, you are taking the right approach. First, arm yourself with the Word and the blood of Jesus.
Just remember it is in His hands.
If you pray, he will hear you.
But remember it may not be through a direct action of yours that deliverance comes. It might be a disaster, and then an act of God that follows.
Wow. This site is so awesome.My Pastor preached on a Jezebel Spirit this morning which led me to google it and came across this site. I have been a victim of this for more than 15 years. I realized sometime back that my husband was possibly a narcassist but never equated it to the same as a Jezebel spirit which makes lots of sense. My whole marriage was a fake, multiple sex acts with young girls that look for extra money (i believe), lying, bad business tactics. just complete non unity as a husband and wife and this has been challenging for me because it could never really be proved and of course he always denied any wrong doings. He has sabotaged my character and I could not get anyone to believe my stories or findings about him. He has convinced my children, friends, family, church colleagues, associates the likes that I have and was the problem. Matter of fact my 16 year son left the home with his dad when he was 13 because his Dad has protrayed himself as the perfect husband, and father and has been influenced him since 10 years old. That is my main concern and prayer that my son does not become a victim like I have over the years. I am more mature as a Christian now and should have just went to GOD asking for him to be exposed, but I needed many people to pray to that end with me once they were convinced of my belief about him. ALthough it has been stressful I hold onto my faith and get reassurance from GOD and a dream I had about my son years before when I really encounterd the marriage disfunction. And the dream was that I visioned my son Micah, with a large transparent dome over him. This for me means that he is sheltered from the elements outside (i.e. his dad’s personality) And I walk by faith not by sight even though it appears he is because he does not come to worship at Church wiht me anymore and he basically has estranged himself from me as he father has. However, I cover him in the WORD more now than ever, as I know that this is a definate SPiritual War. ANd I rest in GOD”s WORD. Isisah 41 v 10 and also reflect on his name Micah which means “WHo is like the LORD”. He will be like his spiritual father GOD and not his Biological Father. Selah. IN Jesus Name.
dear CLM
It is very hard on someone who has this situation in their family. It is like they are canceling every good work and word you put out. We have to remember that God is more than able to fulfill his promises to us. While we may falter, he won’t. He knows the day and time for each person’s salvation. And we can rest in the fact that it will be His work, not ours. Keep the faith, and you will not lose your reward.
Hi Carmen – here is my abuse and I am busy divorcing him after finding the will and way to leave him:
• Chased me out house and locked me out of the house – telling me its his house – this happened often
• Locked main house gate so I could not get into home – had to beg and plead for him to open after I went to look for him at about 3 in the morning
• Locked me out house on several occasions – one time landed in hospital with pneumonia – never brought my son to see me – had to take myself to hospital and take myself home – was terrified for safety of Jordan and even went back while I hospital to check and he was flirting with someone on phone – resulted in massive verbal onslaught
• Landed in hospital in Witbank – mother and father had to come fetch me – they drove from Johannesburg and took me home to Middelburg and he only brought Jordan to see me once – was in hospital Sunday to Wednesday
• Threw me out car in Morningside (Tarryn’s 21st) police took me back to hotel – he also had smashed in the kitchen door at the premises where the party was held and lost his wallet – he blamed my family for stealing it but the venue was filled with strangers. Gavin, the father of Tarryn phoned me on the Monday to tell me the venue expected Stef to replace or pay for damages which Stef never did. Gavin sorted it out because Stef denied he did this but people saw him do it. He got into his car and drove through the parking lot dangerously – I jumped in front of the car to try and stop him as he seemed very out of control and reckless. He then got out of the car and walked away. I was in tears and my children came to me and got in the car so we could look for him – he was already walking towards the highway some distance away. We picked him up he drove at his insistence even though he was totally intoxicated and we dropped children off at their home in Morningside and shortly thereafter he leaned across me opened my door and shoved me out of the car. A security guard at a complex near where I was sitting on the pavement and crying called the police.
• Chocolate incident – threw me and Jordan out car had to beg to get back in and be allowed to go with him to Johannesburg (this was in Potgietersrus). He attacked my morals and values and told me I had no principles.
• Vienna incident – screamed and went on and on at me because I give the children viennas and not Frankfurters – he said could afford to have his children eat the best – I even consulted the children before giving them viennas and asked them if the Viennas would be ok and they said yes they were quite happy with that.
• Rustenburg incident – had been drinking – he hit me through the Landrover driver window whilst I was sitting in the car trying to get away from his madness – he smashed the landrover window and hit me in my face with his face – my nose was bleeding and shards of glass had penetrated my chest area and was also bleeding, he also smashed my cell phone, ripped out the trellidor in the study and went to a bar till all hours – very remorseful next day. I had tried to calm him down in the study and locked the door to try and reason with him – I still cannot recall what set him off as we went out to have dinner but then he started drinking to much red wine. I did ask him not to order more and he did order more and then things very quickly got out of control when we left the restaurant and he degraded and swore at me all the way home.
• Middelburg incident after East London – police called out – had been drinking and kicked me, swore at me and grabbed my cellphone and wanted to phone all my girlfriends for a “fuck “ (sorry about language but that is what he said) locked me out house again and he left in his car when I said the police are coming.
• St Lucia sms’s 84 (he can produce his records for that time period to see how many abusive calls and sms’s he made to me). Over about a 5 hour period he sms’s me and makes very abusive threatening and belittling calls to me – my sister could not believe it and told me to switch my phone off. I did and later when I put the cell phone back on there were terrible messages from him swearing at me, cursing me and blaming me for his mental state.
• Kettle incident Middelburg and telling Jordan to call me fucking arsehole – police called out – have police report – threw kettle at me, swore and screamed at me in front of his kids and Jordan. It started when I found an sms on his phone from another woman saying “Thank you I would love to by the way I love camping” – I asked him what this was about and he started becoming abusive – I asked him to come with me to the kitchen as I did not want the children subjected to another outburst as it was clear this was going to get ugly. He pushed me into a cupboard and my shoulder hit a door handle which broke from the impact. I then walked towards our entertainment area and in the reflection of the glass doors I saw the kettle being thrown at me – I turned and deflected it with my hand and it smashed through a window. He then threw a coffee cup with such force that it left pieces of the cup impailed into the wooden frame of the door and broke the other window. He then threw the cell phone at me then he rushed away shouting profanities went and packed grabbed his kids – Jordan and I ran into the spare room and I locked us in the room. I heard him shouting at his kids “don’t say goodbye to that fucking bitch” – he went to his sister’s place and returned the next day begging me not to go and to stay and he will fix himself.
• Every day calling me a fucking bitch always telling me I am nasty
• Numerous times telling me he is King and will be treated like a King
• As long as I live in the house I will cook –he told me this after I requested we do take-aways one evening
• I had a great fear of him and would tremble when he came near me and sometimes I wet myself
• Carried on screaming and abusing me in front of my young son despite my requests for him to stop
• Continually degraded me in front of his children
• Often threatened total financial cut off
• Often threatened to cancel cell phone and garage card
• Stopped all assistance with Jordan – part of the financial cut off
• I rarely asked him for more money – always used what he gave me.
• Accused me of spending his money but I never even had access to his accounts in fact he kept his financial affairs a secret and I knew nothing about his monetary affairs
• He was often out on Tuesday and/or Thursdays – this seemed to become the norm and I suspect he was having affair(s)
• Marriage started with a sexual messages to his assistant at PPL mine and ended with sexual harassment investigation against him at Middelburg Mine in July/August 2009
• Screamed and shouted and belittled, demeaned, humiliated and degraded me every day
• He was always angry and always said he was like that because of me – blamed me for everything never took responsibility for his own actions.
• Nothing I did was right – it was always wrong and always my fault. I could not voice an opinion without him telling me I have got it all wrong.
• He was always asking me what value I add to the marriage – as if marriage is a business
• I fetched his kids for 5 years every 2nd weekend and holidays for him, took them to psychologist appointments, went to some extra mural sports activities, went to prize giving – he often could not make it for some or other reason – in the beginning I used my own vehicle and my own money even buying them clothes and redoing their bedrooms so that they looked like real little girls rooms. Often did their make up and hair for their modelling days. Entertained them during school holidays and took them on holiday. Often took them shopping and did “girly” things with them.
• His kids used to beg him “Dad, please leave the poor woman alone”
• He sabotaged my relationship with his children as he was jealous because they had come to admire and respect me and sought out my company before his
• Left me sitting in restaurants
• Chased me out of restaurants – sometimes just because I greeted friends who had walked in and he told me it was abnormal. I actually said to him I will be 30 seconds just want to quickly say hi and that turned into another nightmare when I got home.
• Had huge cell phone issues – I was not allowed to touch or answer his cell and he always placed it face down. I believe it is only someone who has something to hide that reacts so defensively.
• Continually picked on me – constantly at me
• Takes DSTV card out decoder many times and tells me its his TV.
• Disconnected my modem so I could not use PC
• Had to tell my friend on his instructions that she cannot buy birthday present for Jordan
• Screamed and yelled at me, asked me how dare I, when I threw the porn video and dildo out – I had the right – it’s my body
• Separation : the night before I leave all he can tell me is that he will be dating so I must not be surprised if my friends phone and tell me he is seeing other women – this came as a shock because we were to separate with a view to seeing if we could work things out
• SMS’s me when he is in the same house with me instead of talking to me
• Could never have a discussion with him – always sending me sms’s and emails
• SMS to Anita at PPL regarding his sexual desires with her at his new town office (Deans old house)
• SMS to Cindy Nel – Thank you I would love to. By the way I love camping – had been drinking again – this led to the kettle throwing incident
• His ex wife wrote a letter which was destroyed by Barbara and Louise from SOAR his Executive Wellbeing counsellors in which she made it very clear he has a VERY bad temper and “we both know it”. He also refused to discipline his children which was an issue in our marriage and interfered with everything – as was her complaint in the exact same letter.
• One night the abuse got so bad at Rustenburg I left in the middle of the night and went to the house of Louise seeking refuge and help.
• He almost never kissed me – would not French kiss at all
• He would never pay me compliments say for instance when I dressed up for functions – he said “what for”
• He attended a lot of the functions himself only notifying me a day in advance and sometimes on the same day
• His family at his sister’s party all organised an outfit for him but I was totally excluded – attended the birthday party but it was very strained – he went as a monk
• Notified me in October 09 via sms that he will be seeing other people.
• He definitely was engaging in relationships since Oct 09 and definitely December 09 – before that he was always hounding me with SMS’s telling me he misses me etc and then suddenly they stopped and he chose to ignore any correspondence from me which was an indication that he had filled his life with someone else who now was getting the focus of attention – it was always clear in our marriage that he had someone “around” as that’s when he left me alone and when he did not have someone he started belittling and degrading me. If I did not respond to his sms’s he would twist it all against me
• I never laid charges at the police station despite pleas from the police to do so because he they said he could lose his job and I felt that I could not risk that as he had a family to support – I do have one police report.
• I have a plethora of abusive emails and sms’s from him
• Screamed at me and told me to fire maid because he could not find clean running shorts
• Fishing experience with Marikie and Dean when I got shouted at and lambasted for doing something I did not do at all, I even emailed his email to me to Marikie and asked her if I had done what he accused me of and she said no way not at all in fact he was the one who was “off” towards me.
• Boerewors incident when his father had to eventually say “For God’s sake Stef its only boerewors”
• If we had a braai and I went to make salad while he was braaing and not sit with him the whole time he would scream and shout and carry on to the point that we did not share the meal
• In my last months in the home he swore and screamed at me every day. I spent my days in tears, worn out and exhausted from all the emotional, mental, physical and verbal abuse. I was isolated and felt like a caged animal.
• I lived with a man who had little to no friends (only ever met John and Alex) and he offered no emotional intimacy. The marriage was a barren desert which I kept trying to cultivate and water only to receive anger, rejection, abuse, verbal ranting and raving and eventually physical abuse.
• Incident where he screamed and shouted at me after his children had lied to me about the “skating” party they attended – he screamed at me in front of Elaine and Garth at their home and blamed me for things I did not do – his children had lied to me and I trusted them enough not to even question the facts that they had shared with me – once again it was me who was doing something for his children but I got the backlash because I did it wrong
• Told me often everything he liked and thought was sexy about me he despises and hates
• Always criticizing and hen-pecking me
• Used to scream at me when I did not thank him for going out every day and working to support us
• Often called me a slut, whore, fuckhead, retard, fucking bitch etc
• Always made me apologise even if I did not do wrong – it was wrong in his eyes
• Always wanted to be thanked and if I delayed one little bit there was an uproar and he would go at me until I thanked him or apologised for not thanking him.
• Told me when he advised me of sexual harassment investigation (just after we separated) against him that he is “hot property” now that he is “single“
• He often sent me messages saying he would be better off dead and if I did not respond then he would tell me I don’t care and if I did respond then it was the wrong response
• Often made arrangements and would drop me at the last minute – then I have to go by myself and make excuses for him
• Small issues would become insurmountable and distorted beyond reasonability and I would often stand there shocked and bewildered at what was being thrown at me
• Found SMS on his phone from his secretary stating “I apologise for my inappropriate behaviour last night) this relates back to not being home at 3 in the morning above) – months later when I asked him about his secretary and their involvement he said he told her “their relationship cannot go any further” so how far had it actually gone? This is Monique and she is still employed as his secretary as at Jan 2010. He said in August 09 that she was told to look for another job???? And that she was involved in the sexual harassment charges
• He was told by his secretary that he was having inappropriate flirtations and body language with another staff member “Elaine” which he said may have been the reason for the sexual harassment charges
• He threatened to have himself sequestrated when we were separating and told me then I would get nothing. He also sent me sms’s saying I would get nothing if I left
• He would not go to some places with me as he said he did not “connect” with the people and had nothing in common with them – yet he raced with all these people. He always said he was unique and different to everyone else
• There was a huge fallout after I gave Jordan ONE chocolate one evening before bed time in about 2007 – he threw the whole box of chocolates at me and Jordan.
• Destroyed two of my wedding albums – he started phoning me in December 08 about how I smile in all the pics he was going through all my photo albums – said its not fair etc – when I returned home in January they were missing plus several pictures out of the various albums
• He went totally ape with me in 2004 when I gave a charity which looks after aids orphans R10000.00 of MY money. I have never seen him put his hand in his pocket for a poor person
• He got rid of me– pushed me out of my home and his life through a systematic process of breaking me down as a human being and made it clear the night of my leaving that he was going to be dating. I kept living in hope that things would get better – if I loved him enough and changed everything about me – but nothing helped because he is a very insecure and unhappy man filling his void with financial prowess and spending recklessly even buying a boat in 2008 when he kept telling me he had no money.
• Once I went to Johannesburg to buy a bike for the kids and went with Jaco who also wanted to buy a bike for his kids from the same shop– this was the father of one of kids at Jordan’s school – had a screaming fit how dare I go with a stranger but this man was not I had known him for some time and his wife as I saw them at the school often. Stef actually eventually sold his bike to him and also uses this man’s property in Knysna for accommodation – so much for the man being a stranger. He even accused me of having an affair with him.
• In Middelburg it was hard to make friends and I was very isolated and had no support systems immediately available
• He threatened suicide many times
• He used to sometimes stay in bed with depression
• The watch incident on Valentines Day/Anniversary 14 Feb 2007 and his abusiveness because I bought him nothing – he had fought really badly with me in the weeks leading up and we were not talking – he bought out of his own free will I never asked for it and it amazed me as he said we had no money but could buy a very expensive watch – another display of reckless spending under financial constraints – so I was either being lied to or he was creating more and more debt – it was an inappropriate gift under the circumstances.
• Last bought me flowers on 1 August 2006 when we moved to Middelburg. Before that maybe twice at most.
• He was emotionally unavailable and we shared no emotional intimacy.
• From October 2008 he kicked me out of the house almost every weekend. December 2008 I spent in Johannesburg with limited finances and it was miserable but I just could not see how I could stay and be with him and his children with the threat of another explosion or violent outburst coming from him and could not entertain the idea of putting the children through anything like that again
• From Oct 2008 he refused to allow my family to come and visit and when they did he was rude to them or disappeared and had a screaming session with me about it
• He kept telling me its his house
• He told me if I leave I will have nothing
• He used to often say we should never have married
• He would often tell me everything about me he used to love he now despised – further devaluing me
• One day his daughter and I drove off in the landrover to meet them at the Wimpy later and he had left his wallet and Porsche keys on the bumper – this was lost – I got a call screaming at me to tell me what I had done. I immediately turned the vehicle around and searched high and low for the keys and wallet but did not find it. I was in a state because I knew this was going to get ugly and it did. He went on at me for days about how stupid I am and its all my fault.
• I even arranged his anti-depressants for him which he asked me to get “to take the edge off”
• He would punish me often by hurting me and attacking my character – character assassination
• When I went to see same psychologist and him I felt like I was subjected to secondary abused by that psychologist – he seemed to take Stef’s side even though I made frantic calls to him when Stef got out of control one evening – he also made diagnoses that he was not qualified to do, research into this revealed that only a psychiatrist can diagnose and only after extensive tests had been carried out. I left this practitioner, as I had no confidence in him and felt he had clearly taken sides and I believe he contributed to further damage in the marriage as he was rammed down my throat by Stef continually and when I left then Stef said I was sick and not facing up to my demons. When we went to Gregory Beck he threw that in my face very day – Gregory Beck unprofessional and after two or three sessions diagnosed me as bipolar – have checked with other psychiatrists and psychologists that this diagnosis cannot be made after such a short time and other psycho symmetric testing had to be done before this could be confirmed and only a psychiatrist could make a diagnosis. Beck shared privileged info with Stef which I had told to him in confidence. He was on the side of Stef because imagine Stef runs a mine with 3500 people on it – so business for Gregory Beck could be very profitable if he supported and cajoled Stef. My current psychologist says I do not display any traits of a bipolar depressive. I have also heard via people in Witbank that he is not a very professional man and always seems to take the side of the man against the woman. He would play people up against each other rather than encourage reconciliation.
• I often felt “emotionally raped” – lost, exhausted, drained, sad, battled with self-blame as so much blame had been projected on me and had no self-esteem and total lack of self-confidence – my reality had been distorted systematically over a period of time so much so I thought I was going insane and questioned my memory and my capabilities. I felt like I had lost my soul.
• When the news agency in Potgietersrus did a newspaper article on my biking accomplishments he threw a fit because I dared to not mention him – after that I always included him in newspaper articles.
• He would shout and rant at me and “pull me down” because I did not use his pictures as my cell or PC screensavers and he did
• He used the words “how dare you” often and “you better”
• He would often go out drinking until all hours and get home and become abusive towards me. At one stage he promised not to drink anymore but this did not last long. One evening in 2008 he finished 3 bottles of wine by himself. When I confronted him about it he told me I must stop checking on him and told me I made him drink
• Once he pinned me to my desk and reaching over me typed an email on my computer from my email address as if I was confessing to or saying certain things and emailed it to himself. I have a copy of this email.
• I would threaten divorce and this seemed to help as he would behave for a while but towards the end it had no effect as he had already discarded me
• He would often criticize my body and I went for plastic surgery at my expense to try and look better for him but then he would find something else to make me feel bad about– he often told me I have ugly feet and ugly legs and my “arse” was fat.
• If I was friendly to people he would tell me I want to “shag” them and then make me feel really bad that I had friends at all. I am by nature a friendly and outgoing person. He critisized my friendships often ge and also attacked the characters of my friends.
Going through a divorce with his is too terrible he has crippled me financially and continues his barrage of legal attacks on me. He wants to give me less than I took into the marraige and he is work about USD3m
I’m glad you have the will to get out and I pray the God will intervene on your behalf. No one deserves to be abused!
This is so amazing that i have found this sight. I have become aware of the strongman of jezebel in my husband. My biggest fear was god was going to make me stay. I now realize that forgiving him does not mean i have to stay with him. i can forgive and pray, but i don’t want to open myself up to him anymore. I have not gone to church for years because of him and now i see i have to get back and get the support of other christians. If anyone has any suggestions for prayer i welcome them, thanks.
hi Lesley
You are not required to be unequally yoked to an unbeliever, so yes, you are free to choose or stay.
There are prayers on this site which deal with family salvation and witchcraft, which is behind the jezebel spirit, and keeping him bound. But remember, Jezebels usually do not repent, and change on their own. It really takes an act of God to turn them around.
http://heavenawaits.wordpress.com/prayer-closing-doors-against-witchcraft-control/
http://heavenawaits.wordpress.com/prayer-covering-for-your-life-and-family/
http://heavenawaits.wordpress.com/prayer-for-unsaved-loved-ones/
Print them out, and modify these to fit your situation.
Here is more about the jezebel types- a list of several pages. maybe 22 posts total. The orange links are introductory. The white links are the full page.
http://heavenawaits.wordpress.com/?s=jezebel
Be blessed. Also, get some friends to support you in prayer and at home.
Hey Marianne,
Sent you a message on FB
Hope you are doing well? been thinking of you! A friend of mine sent to me this very post for me to read and I recognized it as being one of yours. xoxox
I am so overwhelmed rite now- i cant believe others are going threw this -my now x husband is still punishing me and my children daily because we didnt behave-i have seen and lived all of this -please pray for us-he even had us go to married for life classes to show me i would go to hell if he divorced me -he killed and injured animals to punish us -he would rape me to punish the kids-the courts even sided with him because i was to afraide -my kids and i are all being treated for post tramatic stress syndrome-he has financially devestated me- he destroys everyone we love – he has even left me permanentaly disabled and with std’s for life as punishment- thank you for shareing this info- now i know at least what we are dealing with.
dear lisa
You either need a lawyer, or a better one than what you had. Even if you are afraid, a good lawyer will do his job and represent you well. Get your counselor involved and appeal the case.
You also need a male attorney, and a male judge.
You have a warrior jezebel, and they are the cruelest and most dangerous type, causing physical harm. The antichrist will be like this.
I put you on my prayer list. Please stay in touch, and write as often as you need to.
Marianne,
I am married to a sociopath, having determined this reality over time (about 2 years ago). He is a pathological liar, a thief, etc. My husband is charming, a smooth talker, seemingly such a “good guy,” so helpful. Much of his persona is false. We have been separated for two years (he walked out), but he moved back into my house over the summer (he is homeless). We have not reunited, let me asure you. The man is self-employed, being a terrible businessman. He has made my life a living hell. I am employed, working full-time, overitme, plus taking on a parttime job to support myself and my children. He is not a normal person. He reminds me of a little kid who is incapable of maneuvering in life. Years ago, when I still thought he was normal and life was okay (he was partners in a successful, growing business), we were on a family vacation. My husband was standing alone on the deck of a rented log cabin and I was standing below on a grassy hill, looking up at him, when I observed a hazy, active mass in front of him. What I noticed was that his face looked uncomfortable, like he was trying to get something under control . At the time, I didn’t know what I was seeing, but today, I think that it must have been a spiritual entity. Starting in 2003, when my husband went solo in his business, is when the mask started to come off and I saw him for how he really is. Unbelievable to say the least. Regarding his upbringing, I personally suspect that this disorder is on the paternal side of his family (his father most likely had it, an uncle had it (he was committed to a mental hospital), a female cousin that I heard about has it, etc.), believing that it’s in the genes, plus the environmnet can produce a sociopath. What I know about his dad is that he physically abused his children and his mother failed to bond with her children (being “unnurturing and unaffectionate”, having his older sister tell me this). I am wiped out by having such a person in my life, never imagining that these people existed. Would God tell me whether I should divorce him or are we free to go ahead and do so, using a free will for our good?
Marianne,
I am married to a sociopath, having determined this reality over time (about 2 years ago). He is a pathological liar, a thief, etc. My husband is charming, a smooth talker, seemingly such a “good guy,” so helpful. Much of his persona is false. We have been separated for two years (he walked out), but he moved back into my house over the summer (he is homeless). We have not reunited, let me asure you. The man is self-employed, being a terrible businessman. He has made my life a living hell. I am employed, working full-time, overitme, plus taking on a parttime job to support myself and my children. He is not a normal person. He reminds me of a little kid who is incapable of maneuvering in life. Years ago, when I still thought he was normal and life was okay (he was partners in a successful, growing business), we were on a family vacation. My husband was standing alone on the deck of a rented log cabin and I was standing below on a grassy hill, looking up at him, when I observed a hazy, active mass in front of him. What I noticed was that his face looked uncomfortable, like he was trying to get something under control . At the time, I didn’t know what I was seeing, but today, I think that it must have been a spiritual entity. Starting in 2003, when my husband went solo in his business, is when the mask started to come off and I saw him for how he really is. Unbelievable to say the least. Regarding his upbringing, I personally suspect that this disorder runs on the paternal side of his family (his father most likely had it, an uncle had it (he was committed to a mental hospital), a female cousin that I heard about has it, etc.), believing that it’s in the genes, plus one’s environmentt can produce a sociopath. What I know about his dad is that he physically abused his children and his mother failed to bond with her children (being “unnurturing and unaffectionate”, as told to me by his older sister). I am wiped out by having such a person in my life, never imagining that these people existed. Would God tell me whether I should divorce him or are we free to go ahead and do so, using our common sense and/or free to guide us?
dear Susan
If he is a sociopath, he is not saved, not a believer, no matter what he claims.
The bible does not require us to be in such a union. In fact, we told not to be unequally yoked to unbelievers.
You have the option of divorce.
But in the meantime, pray for him. Most jezebels ( sociopaths) do not repent…..they are spiritually blind to what they are, and think there is nothing wrong with them….(“it is you”)…..but there is always a slight chance.
He cannot change unless he sees what he is and wants deliverance.
Also, you are not obliged to support him. He needs to be on his own…..do what is keeps you sane.
Hi Marianne:
Thank you so much for your grace and understanding.
I met this guy at a club we both attend regularly. Prior to the first time I spoke to him, I saw the spirit of jezebel around him and what was a ‘sleezy’ type of spirit. I have no idea if they are one in the same or if there are more than one there operating in him? When we first started talking– he was sweet, attentive, kind and caring. We continued to get to know each other a little (although, he never really divulged much info about himself but would ask others TONS of questions about me and my family and my life behind my back). We were talking for months when he started talking to a woman with a jezebel spirit in the same club. He is a talker and likes to chat with several different people. I didn’t think anything of it at first, but then saw there was a weird, sexual attraction there. that was very twisted. He swore up and down that he wasn’t attracted to this woman but I suspect he was lying. He got very jealous one nite because I was talking to a male friend of mine and he started flirting VERY heavily with this woman right in front of me. This went on for at least 20 minutes and he made plans to meet her the following day in the same place and such. He had done this before to other women as well. A weird game he plays with them. Of course he never followed thru and left her hanging there. He did this with a lot of women as a game. I knew, when he first started talking to her that there would be trouble–and there has been. They’ve been trying to seduce him and have also been cursing me. It’s been ongoing now for over a year…this woman is deeply into the occult and often times would manifest openly (talking to herself, anger, rage, strange behavior—sitting with her head back and mouth open and legs open on gym equipment, etc.) she and her ‘group’ of witches have been trying to curse me and my family (a family member of mine has since died, i’ve had financial problems and impossible to find work, etc., relationship problems, etc…) and the guy that we were both talking to also almost died He started this with her by lying about his financial status to get attention, as well as pretending to be single (I found out when he almost died that he is indeed married) and his wife emailed me a few weeks ago to ask what he was up to because she intercepted an email I had sent to her addressing some of this strange behavior and asking him to please stop making so many problems for me and that if that were going to be the case I was going to just avoid any interacting with him from here on out. His wife seems like an amazing and sweet woman. I tried to encourage her that there is hope for them and their family (they have three kids) and invited her to church as well. I could hear the pain in her voice and because I was married to someone like that once—I could relate. This man is a pathological liar, he cons and scams his friends, he manipulates his family for money and he does not want to work.
I want to pray for him but am afraid of the jezebel spirit attacks. I am worried because I was talking to him and at one time liked him that I may have formed a ‘soul tie’ that needs to be broken. Specially with all the witchcraft involved.
Any kind of insight would be helpful! Thank you so much!
hi
1. get out of the nightclub. Only weird spirits go there.
2. do you have contact with these female jezebels outside of the night club?
you mentioned gym equipment. are you in school?
3. Stop being timid around jezebels. Unless they work wtih you and affect your paycheck, you do not need to be so submissive with them, no matter how many there are. Be aggressive and tell them off, and stay away from them. tell them the are a bunch of stupid witches and they cannot hurt you. You are protected by the blood of Jesus and going to heaven and they are going to hell. Stick up for yourself.
4. dump association with the playboy. he is an idiot, and thinks he is hot. He is a stupid man with his head screwed on wrong.
5. his wife needs the same advice you do. dump trouble and get away from it. Don’t hang around someone who will bring you down. She needs to get a lawyer and sue for child support. the bible says we are not obligated to stay with an unbeliever.
I am so thankful for this post, I just broke up with my boyfriend some time ago, I did not understand why it was so devastating to me, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. Now I see that he had all of these characteristics and some of the Peter Pan Jezebel qualities also. I am now working on personal healing from the pain and betrayal that was caused as a result of staying in this toxic relationship and I regret to say the healing has not been easy to recover from.
My concern is, I think I may still be attracting this same kind of man with this spirit into my life. How do you close the door to these types of men permenantly. I have an interest in a man yet it is hard to determine if he is sincere in his faith and character to get to know him better, or if he is simply another Jezebel type character that I need to stay away from. I have tried to pray about this man, his intention’s, sincerity and so on, but I feel my emotion’s and trust levels are not yet stable to see the truth about this man. I am very cautious and over sensitive to encountering the same person with a different face all over again. I think after you have been in a relationship with this kind of man it makes you all the more suspicious of all men’s intention’s and character.
I do not want to be alone and drive the right man away either, but one’s perception’s are heavily coloured after going through this kind of devastating experience.
hi pray
If you question your own assessment of the man, get the opinions of others and see what they think.
INTERESTING TOPIC.
INTERESTING.
hi, it’s been now 5 years that we got to know that the pastor of our church has committed adultery with a woman in our church and he said that he had repent and he continue to preach ……. but we recently got an information that he is still with that woman……i’m the main singer and my husband was the pastors assistant my husband expalin the matter to the Apostle of the church and he talk to our pastor …..and he said at the very first time that he has end up his relationship with that woman………and he treated my husband so badly that my husband try to escape from him by accepting a job on a cruise ship just to stay away like Elijah from jezabal………..now i’m still at that church and this pastor is living in sin………..even the apsotle can’t say a word coz our pastor is really God liar ………can’t say a word coz he will deny everything PRAY for us…….the situation we are living is really painful…
esther
You need to openly denounce and reject him in front of the church, and tell why. You do not need his permission to do this.
You should tell the church to fire him, since he is a man of sin, and will not repent.
If he stays, or the church approves of him, then leave this church. You do not need them and should not tolerate this hypocrisy.
thank’s my dear sister really need words like this ,my husband leave the church because of that but i have a deep sadness in my soul because the God ‘s people going to that church and church members when i mention to leave the church….i feel like i’m going to abandon them help sister what should i do this keep me in a spiritual prison………pray for me and my husband ………..
hi esther
If you are not going to confront the sinful pastor, then leave. You are not doing any good staying there. There are other churches where you would be happier. You are not obligated to stay there. The other people also have the free choice to leave.
thank you sis your advice help me ……….
the same pastor it’s been 2 weeks ago he was preaching on the spirit of jezabel…..and he said it’s a spirit in control and was mocking of the attitude elijah has when jezabel was searching for an opportunity to kill him……how he could actual preach on that spirit…..and in our church if you get oppose against him and if you ‘re a woman you are actually called jezabel a rebellious one……..whatever happen you should humble under the autority of God ……advice me sister Marianne so that i can reply to him…..because a sister in church try to raise her voice against him and the elders ,the pastors ..said that she is a rebellious woman and was jezabel herself……how to deal if even i’m in that sister situation……need your advice….
Just leave. they are all infected. they are hopeless. Let God handle this situation.
I would love to share his, but the picture is NOT something that should be seen by Christian men, inciting them to lust! Please, pray about changing it!
Christian men should not be incited to lust over this picture.
If they are then they are not what they should be, and their behavioral response is their fault, not mine.
The picture would only hit a familiar key with them, and expose them for what they are.
Hence, the picture would be an accurate representation of the spirit described.
My intention is to expose and destroy the spirit, not hide it.
So if the spirit manifests in the man after seeing the picture, he should pray for forgiveness, and have others pray for him.
Unfortunately, jezebels do not repent usually, and so will blame their response on someone else.
This will confirm what they are to others.
If you don’t like the picture, you can always copy and paste the text into a word document and share it that way.
Please consider changing your pictures for these helpful descriptions as they are very worldly.
hi Karen
See my response to the person above your comment.
The pictures are supposed to represent exactly what the spirit is doing.
Spirits are in this world, and this is what they look like.
If I painted a nice picture, people would miss the point.
Or if I painted a evil picture, it would not match up with what they see.
please continue to heal and let GOD teach you how to love and take care of you first.its too soon to attempt any such relationship.you are very vulunerable right now and satan comes to deceive in many faces.god will let you know when such time is in terms of starting asnother relationship.dont be eager to fail yourself.GOD knows best so just sit back and watch the LORD’S salvation.LOVE YOU SISTER
Hi Marianne,
The understanding that the Lord has given you is a blessing. Like many above, I have my own story and almost 6yr encounter, with what I now understand (thanks to the Grace of God), was a man with such a spirit. Here’s my thing, now we are in the exiting phase (I ended the relationship) and God revealed ALL the truth about this man and the last five years of secrets he kept. Let’s just say he fit EVERY characteristic described above. At this time, his behavior is unpredictable (one minute he’s texting me and telling me how he’s seeking forgiveness and deliverance, he’s crying and he’s SO SORRY… the next he respects my wish and doesn’t speak to me and he’s texting/calling another woman/women), and unfortunately, i still live really close to him and share a business with him. I’ve been able to cut all other attachments but these two are taking some time. What should I be aware of until the Lord helps me to cut the Business and Living proximity? Pastors, friends, etc. say that even though it’s been revealed that he was fooling around with multiple women, and at this time, he has yet another “new girl.” He’s still will come for me (even after I ended everything). Can you tell me, by the power of the Holy Spirit, what advice can you give for this phase?
hi danielle
What you describe is a challenge. I think you are going in the right direction. Just do your best to maintain your balance and insight as you interact with him.
tell him to get counseling. he needs to understand what his problem is, so he does not bother you with it.
be polite and pray for him, tell him he needs Jesus in his life, and in a sincere relationship. he cannot have a good human relationship, if the one he has with God is not good.
he needs to work on himself first, and not bother any woman until he straightens himself out.
so when you see him, just remind yourself that he is spiritually sick, and you do not want to get infected with the spirit that is on him.
What he has to offer is defective, and will not give you what you need.
you can be kind, but you do not have to take him back.